Westminster’s Matthew Tyler hired as Atlanta Falcons coach

Around Westminster’s campus, Coach Matthew Tyler is known as the best substitute teacher in the high school and as an assistant coach for the football team. However, starting next season, he will be known all throughout Atlanta as the head coach of the Atlanta Falcons. After back-to-back losing seasons, the Atlanta Falcons decided to fire the current head coach, Arthur Smith, and replace him with Westminster’s own Coach Tyler. The move was recently announced by General Manager Terry Fontenot at a press conference to introduce the new coach.

“We have agreed terms with Coach Tyler and he will begin coaching the team for the 2023 season,” said Fontenot. “We got our guy.”

The Falcons have been one of the worst teams in the league in recent years and have gained a reputation for blowing leads late in games. However, Tyler is confident that he can fix their problems. At the introductory press conference, Tyler laid out his plans for the team. 

“I’m going to get those boys into shape,” said Tyler. “There won’t be any more 28-3 blown leads on my watch.”

When pressed by reporters about his inexperience and being the youngest NFL head coach in history, Tyler answered back with conviction, putting to rest all doubts about his preparedness.

“I know I’m ready to lead this team,” said Tyler. “Many people are even calling me a coaching prodigy, but not me, because I’m too humble.” 

Tyler went on to talk about his realistic goals for his own performance, as well as the team’s performance, for future seasons. He seemed to think differently than most NFL experts did about the Falcons’ prospects for success. 

“I’m thinking that we’ll roll to a Super Bowl next year and then we’ll usher in the beginning of an Atlanta Falcons dynasty,” said Tyler. “I’m sure I’ll be on the fast track to the Pro Football Hall of Fame in no time.” 

Even with his lofty expectations, some Falcons players are enthusiastic about Tyler taking over, like Pro Bowler defensive end Grady Jarrett.

“I don’t know much about our new coach, but I heard a rumor that he has a spot on the Westminster weight room leaderboard,” said Jarrett. “Anyone that can pull a feat like that off is definitely qualified to coach this team.”

Others aren’t so sure, like veteran running back Cordarelle Patterson, who has questions about Tyler’s experience. 

“I’m a little surprised to see a head coach younger than a bunch of the players,” said Patterson. “We’re used to coaches with a little more experience.”

However, Westminster students who have experienced Tyler as a substitute teacher and an assistant football coach recognize his qualifications and are passionately defending him. Students rave about his teaching and coaching skills and believe those skills make him a perfect fit for the Atlanta Falcons head coaching job.

“If you saw the way he runs the classroom when he’s substituting, you would know he’s ready to lead the Falcons,” said one Westminster junior. “When he subbed for my English class, it was the best class I had all year.”

Another major factor in Tyler’s preparation is his playing of the mobile football game Retro Bowl. Retro Bowl is a mobile game in which you manage an NFL team’s roster and control the team on the field. Tyler believes his status as an elite Retro Bowl player was instrumental to him receiving the job and is planning on playing it even more to prepare for his head coaching job. 

“Playing Retro Bowl on my phone is pretty much like coaching an NFL team in real life, right?” said Tyler. “So I’m pretty sure I got this.”  

While students are sad to see the beloved Tyler departing, everyone is excited to see another one of Westminster’s own alums succeeding in the NFL. The Westminster community wishes good luck to Coach Tyler in his new role. With him at the helm, the Atlanta Falcons will surely be turned around in no time.